When it comes to knowing how to be physically attractive or even how to impress someone you like, the honest truth is that your personality always trumps physical attraction.
But that doesn’t mean we should overlook appearances. Presents always look better gift-wrapped, and the odds of someone giving you a second glance also increase when you look better on the outside.
You might think you are stuck with the looks you are born with, and in a way, that’s true.
However, it’s important to work with what you’ve got, know your best features, and understand that being attractive isn’t just about the prettiest face or best body in the room.
Learning to increase your physical attraction doesn’t always mean adjusting your physical appearance in any way!
Psychology of attraction
We all know attraction when we feel it. But why do we feel it? What are the components that factor into whether or not we are attracted to a particular person or not?
There are many types of attraction – not just physical. So, let’s go over them.
1. Physical attraction
The first and most obvious sign of attraction is physical attraction. We all know what that is. Some people might not think it’s not that important, but it is.
It may not give you “forever love,” but it’s usually the first thing that pulls you toward someone.
For most people, if there isn’t physical attraction to another person, then they aren’t likely to get into a romantic relationship with them.
2. Platonic attraction
Most people think this is the “friend zone.” But platonic attraction is the desire to have a relationship with someone that isn’t sexual.
In other words, it’s just based on friendship and non-romantic love. This form of attraction is felt for friends and even family members because you don’t have any sexual desire for any of them, but you still are connected to them.
3. Aesthetic attraction
Some people get physical attraction and aesthetic attraction confused. But there is one key difference. Aesthetic attraction is being attracted to someone’s physical appearance simply because you appreciate their beauty.
This isn’t necessarily linked to sexual or romantic attraction, although it can be.
4. Emotional attraction
Emotional attraction is a deep feeling of connection to someone else. You can think someone is totally hot, but you might not feel any emotional attraction to them if they are a jerk.
Or maybe you don’t find someone overly physically attractive, but yet somehow you are drawn to them emotionally.
This is the “pulling at your heartstrings” type of attraction, and it’s the kind that can bond people together for a lifetime.
5. Intellectual attraction
Intellectual attraction sometimes gets confused with emotional attraction. However, they are a little different.
When you have an intellectual attraction for someone, you’re interested in their thoughts and opinions on a wide variety of topics. You can have long conversations about anything and never be bored by them because you are fascinated by their mind.
6. Sensual attraction
This sounds like it should be the same as physical attraction, but it’s not. Sensual attraction is the desire for physical contact with another person, but not necessarily in a sexual way.
If you’re sensually attracted to someone, then you want to touch, hug, cuddle, or massage them. You have the desire to be physically close to them.
How do I know if I’m attractive?
This may sound like a silly question because most people would say, “just look in the mirror, and you’ll know!” But it isn’t always that simple.
There are plenty of attractive people in the world who don’t know they’re attractive. And there are also some unattractive people who think that they are more attractive than they actually are.
So, here are some signs that other people find you attractive.
1. You get compliments
If you find that people are always complimenting you on how pretty/handsome you are, then that’s a clear sign. However, it can be more subtle, too, like saying they like your hair, your eyes, or the clothes you are wearing.
2. People flirt with you
Sometimes it’s difficult to distinguish between flirting and friendliness.
But if you find a pattern where the opposite sex seems to be overly friendly with you on a regular basis, then they are probably flirting with you because you are attractive.
3. People ask you out
If people are asking you out on dates, well, that’s because they find you physically attractive, right?
Sure, it could also be your sparkling personality, but in that case, they could just be your friend if they didn’t think you were hot.
4. People are surprised if you’re single
When you’re single – whether by choice or circumstance – people are shocked to hear that you’re not in a relationship or married. They feel this way because they can’t imagine why an attractive person wouldn’t be in a romantic relationship.
5. Some people seem jealous of you
Perhaps you have some co-workers who give you the stink eye from time to time. Or you hear through the grapevine that some people have been badmouthing you.
Well, unless you really are a jerk, it could be because they are jealous that you’re so attractive.
6. People tell you that you’re attractive
This is the most obvious sign that you are attractive. Whether it’s random people telling you how hot you are or the people who ask you out on a date, you can be sure that you’re attractive if people are telling you.
Physical attraction and sex appeal
Physical attraction is a person’s ability to create a sexual desire in someone else.
If you’re physically attractive, you’d find it easier to attract someone you like, at least for the first conversation.
But by no means does it mean that physically attractive people have better relationships or are better lovers.
Everyone has their own expectations when it comes to physical attraction. And what you have to remember about physical attraction is that you can’t please everyone or attract everyone, no matter how hard you try.
To actually win someone over and make them like you, focus on your personality. It’ll give you a much better chance of attracting people over the long term.
Physical attraction, dates, and love
If you consider yourself to be physically attractive, you’d feel more confident in your ability to attract the opposite sex.
And as much as personality matters in a relationship, your attractiveness plays a bigger part when exchanging stolen glances for the first time.
When you meet someone on a blind date, wouldn’t you make an assumption about the person you’re on the date with even before both of you exchange the first sentence?
If that isn’t the effect of physical attraction, then what is?
Physical attraction and your perception
To truly understand how you can improve your physical attractiveness and attract people, you need to understand its role in your life and how it affects your behavior.
If you were in a room and an attractive person of the same gender as yours walked in, do you feel threatened by their presence?
If you feel uncomfortable or threatened each time someone attractive walks in, you’re putting yourself down through your body language.
When you feel convinced that the other person is better looking and more eye-catching than you are, you feel weaker, more helpless, and more annoyed, especially if the one you’re trying to impress appears to be giving this good-looker all their attention.
And when you feel weaker in front of another person you perceive as better looking, you lose your confidence, and you end up ruining the odds of impressing the one you like.
Physical attractiveness is a perception, and you’re the only one who can convince you whether you’re attractive or bad-looking.
It’s all in your head, and how attractive you look starts and ends with your own perception of your physical appearance.
Physical attraction and interactions
If you’re physically attractive, you may intimidate people more easily. People you interact with for the first time may be wary of you because they may assume you’re too full of yourself.
But the very second you smile or speak warmly to them, they open up and get warmer toward you.
Attractive people with warm personalities are always liked and admired by everyone else. If you find someone attractive and are having a conversation with them for the first time, you’d find it harder to lie to them or talk rudely to them.
In fact, when a friendly person you find attractive walks up to you, you’d instinctively show off your best side and speak in a flirty manner, even if your partner is around!
Physical attractiveness can make your world a friendlier place, but it can’t give you love. After all, only the young and the careless fall head over heels in love solely on grounds of physical attraction.
But with all that said and done, physical attractiveness does matter, whether you’re in love or still looking for love. It gives you the second glance you need to attract someone, and it shows people you respect yourself and take care of yourself. And honestly, not much is more desirable than self-respect and self-care.
55 easy ways to increase physical attraction and look hotter
Whether it’s because you just want a confidence boost or to catch the eye of a certain someone, physical attraction brings lots of benefits.
It helps you not only find a partner but also feel happier with who you are. This makes you feel more positive and energetic and makes you believe in yourself—and who wouldn’t want that?
So, what are the ways that you can increase your physical attraction? Here are the top tips to learn how to become more attractive.
Some are quick fixes, and some are more long-term goals, but if you work through them, you are sure to feel super attractive, confident, and happy by the end!
1. Look your best
It’s harsh but true; appearances do matter. After all, physical attractiveness relies solely on outward appearances. If you love yourself and care about the image you’re portraying to the world, you will look your best at all times.
How you look plays a very big part in physical attraction. But physical attraction isn’t always about being cute. It’s about creating sexual desire.
2. Stand up straight
A person who walks tall with an erect back will catch everyone’s attention all the time.
Good posture will always make you tower above everyone else, even if you’re shorter than the people around you, and it’ll definitely make you appear more physically attractive too.
So, use your body language to display confidence. You’ll seem more attractive as soon as you step into a room.
3. Keep your wardrobe updated
Having good dress sense also makes all the difference when it comes to finding someone attractive or not.
You don’t have to look like you walked straight off the catwalk but learning what looks good on you, what flatters your shape and having your own unique sense of style really makes a difference.
Dress in clothes that look good on you and accentuate your assets. Do you have a favorite pair of jeans? You probably like it because you feel it makes you look better than your other jeans.
This may give you a yardstick to choose other clothes that can help you appear more attractive.
4. Don’t feel threatened
Just believe in yourself. Do you feel threatened each time someone who looks good walks into the room?
If you feel threatened or self-conscious around attractive people, you’ll never feel bigger or better than them.
5. Stop comparing yourself
We’re all perfect in our own way. You don’t have to be skinny, more full-figured, muscular, or leaner just to look better than someone else.
You are who you are, so work around your flaws to be the best you can be. Comparing yourself with someone else constantly will not help you, nor will it make you look any better.
6. Don’t reveal your insecurity
Do you force your partner to avoid looking at someone attractive? Or do you yell at them when their eyes keep scanning the room toward another attractive person?
If you do, that just reveals your insecurity. If you show your partner just how insecure you are around another attractive person, your partner will also start believing that you’re not very attractive!
Along the same lines, don’t bitch about an attractive person’s appearance. It only reveals your own insecurities when it comes to appearances.
7. The art of touching
A subliminal way to appear more physically attractive is by using the power of touch. Lingering touches at the right time will always make you seem more physically attractive.
8. The right fragrance
Your body produces natural fragrances that can increase your physical attractiveness. But to accentuate it, you can also use perfumes that complement your body’s fragrance and make you smell more sexually attractive.
9. A healthy appearance
Get a good night’s rest every night, and avoid surrounding yourself with negative people. When you feel positive about life, you’ll start to feel more positive about yourself.
Eat a lot of fresh fruits and vegetables every day, and your skin will start to glow with a naturally attractive radiance within a few weeks.
10. Pamper yourself
Have you ever noticed someone on the street with that *rich person glow*? They appear rich and look exceptionally well-dressed, even if they’re just wearing jeans and a tee.
Why is that? Well, for starters, they respect their body and take care of them.
Work out, eat well, and, irrespective of whether you’re a guy or a girl, pamper yourself with beauty products. The more you take care of your skin and your body, the more attractive you’ll appear.
11. Be mysterious
An air of mysteriousness about you always makes you seem more attractive and sexy. Don’t reveal all too soon when you’re talking to someone for the first time.
If you’re too enthusiastic and eager to please when you meet someone, you’ll lose the aura of mysteriousness that can make you appear a lot more attractive.
12. Eye contact
Making eye contact is one of the best ways to increase physical attraction and build sexual tension with the person you like.
Make strong eye contact and look right into their eyes while speaking with them. Good eye contact makes you appear confident, and that makes you more sexually appealing.
13. Grooming habits
Physical attraction is all about the details. Dress well, groom yourself, and shower regularly.
Clean, supple hands and a well-groomed appearance always make you seem more likable and attractive.
14. Smile and laugh
People like to be around others who are happy and like to have fun. So, if you are someone who doesn’t smile much *or have many facial expressions at all*, then you should work on that.
Smiling makes you appear open, friendly, and warm. People’s faces light up when they smile. So, don’t think that looking sullen and sultry gets you anywhere.
Bare your pearly whites instead. If you don’t like your smile, there are many options for treatment to straighten and whiten them, which could really boost your self-confidence.
Laugh at other people’s jokes and tell a few of your own. Be light-hearted, and people will find you much more attractive.
15. Get in shape
While physical attractiveness isn’t all about how you look, as we discussed above, it certainly plays a big part – at least initially. So, if you are not in good shape, then that is a great place to improve upon.
Lose some weight, go to the gym, and get healthy. You don’t have to look like a supermodel, but at least try to be at your ideal weight for your height.
16. Eat right
Nutrition affects our body more than you know – and a lack of it can make us look unattractive. So, if you’re eating fast food every day and hardly eat any fruits and vegetables, you should re-think your eating habits.
Your body needs vitamins and minerals to look and feel its best. So, don’t deprive yourself of that, and it will show in your attractiveness to other people.
17. Open body language
Body language accounts for 80-90% of the messages that we express to other people, especially when it comes to physical attraction.
So, it’s no surprise that body language also plays a huge part in whether other people find you attractive.
Therefore, you want to make sure that you have open body language. In other words, don’t close yourself up by crossing your arms and legs.
If you do, you will send the message that you are not open to any romantic gestures from other people.
18. Your walk
Someone’s walk can either be a turn-on or a turn-off. If you walk with your head down and your shoulders slumped, then you look like you have low self-esteem, which is not attractive to most people.
You should walk with your head held high to look like you’re exuding confidence.
You don’t have to change the whole way that you walk, but just be more mindful and make sure that you don’t look like Eyore from Winnie the Pooh!
When people use a lot of gestures, it’s usually because they are animated and friendly. These are the kinds of people that others naturally are attracted to and appear to be higher up on the physical attraction scale.
So, if you’re the kind of person who practically sits on their hands when you talk, try to switch that up and be a little more lively when you are having a conversation.
20. Be positive
One of the things that make people the most attractive is being happy and positive. No one likes being around a “Debbie Downer” or an energy vampire. That’s not attractive at all.
So, talk about positive things, and don’t go around complaining. The more you talk positively, the more people you will attract.
21. Be interesting
Attractiveness takes many forms. One is a person with a lot going on.
If you have lots to say, understand what’s going on in the world, and have many passions, hobbies, and interests, you are far more intriguing and attractive than someone who doesn’t really do anything.
22. Be interested
Asking lots of questions and showing that you want to get to know the other person, making them feel listened to and interesting, is also a good way to appear more attractive to any person you have a conversation with.
23. Make others laugh
If you bring a smile to other people’s faces and make them laugh, they want to spend more time with you because you make them enjoy themselves more. It’s as simple as that!
24. Have a big group of friends
Having a large group of friends makes you appear super popular and, therefore, more attractive to the opposite sex. Research shows that the ‘cheerleader effect’ works for both guys and girls.
That is, if you are in a big pack of people of the same sex, you tend to all appear more attractive than if you kept a close-knit circle of friends.
25. Be confident
Being confident is a very attractive quality. You can have the most average face, but if you walk into the room and own it, it is very attractive. Someone who believes in themselves and owns it is highly attractive to those around them.
26. Be open
Being open and honest is another attractive quality. By being friendly and sharing your feelings and stories with others, they feel as though you confide in them, which naturally brings the pair of you closer together.
27. Wear red
If you want to know how to be more attractive, remember that red has been shown to be a color that stands out and gets you noticed, and also makes you appear more attractive. This is especially true when ladies wear red lipstick.
28. Wear glasses
Cute glasses have been shown to be a sign of intelligence and also give you that geeky-yet-sexy look that so many people find attractive. Why not give them a try?
29. Grow a beard
One for just the gentlemen, obviously! Growing stubble or a beard boosts your attractiveness by making you appear more rugged and manly.
30. Make others feel great
If you compliment others, support them, and make them feel good about themselves, they naturally feel good about you too.
31. Be generous
Generosity is another attractive quality often overlooked.
There is something very attractive about a person who is generous. That doesn’t mean that you have to buy shots for everyone every time you are out.
Generosity can come in many forms. If you know someone needs something and you have enough, giving them some of what you have adds to your attractiveness.
32. Be kind
Kindness costs nothing. A person who is obviously kind and gentle of nature is far more attractive compared to someone mean or sullen.
People are attracted to someone who is good on the inside and cares for others. There is something very attractive about putting others in front of yourself and stopping to do acts of goodwill.
People want to be around others who are kind and will help them out when they need it. Being kind is absolutely something that will add to your all-round attractiveness.
People who don’t get stressed out and tend to live in the moment are also deemed more attractive than those who fret and constantly worry about something.
That is easier said than done, but invest some time into stress-reducing hobbies and you’ll find yourself drawing people in without you knowing it!
34. Don’t cry
Crying too much, whether a guy or a girl, can actually be quite off-putting. Obviously, if it’s appropriate to cry it’s fine, but don’t go overboard. Otherwise, you quickly turn the other person off. Imagine how you’d feel in you approached someone in a bar and, all of sudden, they started crying. Talk about awkward!
35. Be adventurous
Having an adventurous spirit, being brave and daring, and being up for new experiences is a seriously attractive quality in anyone.
If you want to know how to be more attractive, make sure you are informed, well-read, and opinionated. These qualities will make you much more attractive than someone who knows nothing about the world.
37. Have your life together
People tend to find those more ‘sorted’ in life more attractive. If you have a good career, a nice house, and generally seem like you’ve got your act together this is a massive plus in your attractiveness column!
38. Be honest and respectful
Being an honest person is very, very attractive. There is nothing less attractive than catching someone embellishing or not being truthful.
Cheesy chat-up lines and treating others disrespectfully make the most physically attractive person seem ugly. So, make sure you aren’t one of them!
Being able to trust someone makes them highly attractive.
39. Be genuine
No one likes someone fake. Be sure you are genuine and not only will you naturally appear more attractive, you’ll also be a better person overall.
40. Work with what you have
Everyone has features they don’t like and others they do. So, even if you don’t feel physically attractive, play to your strengths.
Accentuate those pretty eyes, cracking pout, those slender legs—work with what you’ve got. If you highlight the parts of your appearance you do like rather than focus on the parts you don’t, you’ll instantly look and feel more attractive.
41. Pay attention to your skin and hair
Smooth skin and shiny hair are super attractive, as they indicate that you take care of yourself and practice good personal hygiene. So, make sure you give your skin and hair a boost whenever you can.
42. Work out
Exercising regularly not only makes you feel good but also tones up your body and gives you more energy. Having a healthy, toned body is extremely attractive too.
43. Use makeup
While piling on layer after layer of makeup is not a good look for anyone, using makeup to highlight your features will bring out the physical attractiveness you already had.
44. Drink lots of water
Drinking lots of water will keep you hydrated, and give you with plump, smooth skin and bright eyes.
45. Get a dog
If in doubt, get a cute pet! While getting a dog is a serious commitment, research shows an adorable four-legged friend helps you appear more adorable yourself!
46. Have empathy
Someone who is empathetic is super attractive. The ability to put yourself into someone else’s situation and not judge attracts people to you.
If you always see the good in people because you can empathize with their situation and what they are going through, people will want to be around you because you are just an easier-going person than someone who is judgmental.
47. Take care of yourself
You don’t have to be a perfect size two, have the perfect features, or have curves and definition. The key to your attractiveness is taking care of yourself like you like who you are.
After all, there is something very attractive about a person who is comfortable in their own skin and takes care of themselves. It says, “I like me and you should too.”
48. Be successful
Being successful is a also a huge part of physical attraction. People like someone who knows what they want, where they are going, and are motivated enough to put the energy to get where they want to be.
Someone who is climbing the corporate ladder and works their ass off to get there is very attractive.
49. Be independent
Sure, we are all here to help one another and to lean on each other a little, but there is something very attractive about a person who can stand on their own two feet and is independent.
We want someone who will need us a little, but it is very attractive if you can do your own thing and don’t need to be babysat.
50. Have manners
You don’t have to hold your pinky up when you are drinking afternoon tea, but having manners adds to your attractiveness.
Being highly civilized and knowing when things are appropriate and when they aren’t is a highly attractive feature.
It is a rarity in this day and age for someone to know how to behave, have a filter, and conform to using formalities when it is appropriate. So, showing some manners will help you stand out from the crowd and appear more attractive.
51. Play extreme sports
Of course, you should do this carefully. But a person who plays extreme sports is obviously a very adventurous person who doesn’t mind taking risks.
Believe it or not, a lot of people find this quality very sexy in another person. It might make them admire you or perhaps give them the subconscious feeling that you could keep them safe.
52. Do volunteer work
When you do volunteer work, it shows that you have empathy for other people *or even animals.* Empathy is the ability to feel what other people feel and see situations from their perspective, not just your own.
No one likes selfish people, so volunteering your time to help others is a very attractive quality to most people. Find a cause you believe in and then people will admire you for it.
53. Stop trying to look model-thin
Most women think that they need to look like a supermodel for men to find them attractive. Not only is this not true, but many men also don’t like women who are overly skinny.
So, don’t try to make your body into something that it’s not. Love your body regardless of its shape or form. Focus on your confidence, and then people will find you attractive no matter what body type you have.
54. Get the right haircut
You should never underestimate the importance of hair when it comes to physical attraction.
Many men like long hair on women because it makes them look more feminine. But a nice style that compliments your face shape is important too.
As for the guys, you should have some sort of style too. Don’t just grow it long and scraggly or have a buzz cut. There’s nothing wrong with those, but it helps your attractiveness to have a haircut that looks purposeful.
55. Relax your face
While having animated gestures can make you look more attractive, sometimes relaxing your face can have the same effect. People don’t always need to appear charismatic and outgoing to be attractive.
Relaxing your face can bring a sense of mystery or sexiness to you at times. But you have to do it in the right situation. If you’re in a group of people who are partying, that might not be the right time.
Do it in a more romantic and relaxed atmosphere.
The don’ts of attractiveness
Now let’s talk about what makes you unattractive.
1. Being gross
It is not attractive at all to be gross. Sure, “gross” is all in the eye of the beholder, but spitting, dipping, farting whenever you feel like it, and belching without any hesitation are all generally unattractive things.
If you are hot, doing those things can make you not.
2. Having a foul mouth
Swearing just makes you sound ignorant and unattractive. When you talk offensively or have a foul mouth, you make people around you uncomfortable, which doesn’t attract people to you.
There is a time for locker room talk; namely, in the locker room. Save the cuss words for guys’ or girls’ night, not when you are out in the general public.
Yep, if you see a hot girl or guy and they start to light up, you can instantly lose attraction for them.
Smoking is not attractive for almost the entire population. It does not make you look cool, and it smells bad. Those are all not things that scream attractiveness.
4. Poor self-grooming
If you can’t take a shower before you hit the club, you can have the best body in the world, but no one will know because they won’t want to be close to you.
If you don’t do the basics to make yourself smell better than a farm animal, that is so not attractive!
Nothing ruins physical attraction more than being rude to other people. If you are rude and don’t care about other people’s feelings, that is a huge turnoff.
People who treat the wait staff like their own personal slaves, are non-appreciative, or just feel like everyone was put on earth to serve them are unattractive – period. It is purely ugly to be ugly to people.
Negative people aren’t much fun to be around. If you can’t ever see the bright side of things or you tend to make a bad situation worse, then you aren’t someone that people want to be around.
You are someone who people avoid. If you have nothing nice to say ever, no one wants to hear from you.
Confidence is attractive, but arrogance is not. There is a fine line between being confident and being cocky.
If you cross over it, you aren’t attracting anyone to want to be around you, and likely, you are driving people away. Stop thinking you are awesome and come back down to earth where the rest of us live.
Do you want to know what isn’t attractive? A guy or girl who is still living in their parent’s basement with no hopes of doing better.
If your mom and dad are still paying your bills and doing your laundry, then it doesn’t matter what you look like on the outside, that is just plain unattractive.
No one wants to be with someone who is selfish. Even if you have the hottest body in the world, if you are all about pleasing yourself, that is not attractive, and your looks aren’t going to override it.
If you can’t share, compromise, or even give in once in a while, and the only person that exists in your world is you, then you aren’t attractive to others; that is guaranteed.
10. Drinking too much
A couple of drinks is totally fine, but if you get so sloppy drunk that someone has to either leave you or carry you home, that isn’t attractive.
It is hard to have an attraction to someone if you are holding their hair every weekend or finding them passed out in their own vomit. Not having limitations on your bad behaviors or self-control is not attractive in the least.
Not everyone can be born beautiful on the outside. There are many ways that you can attract people to want to be with you, and ways you can be highly attractive on the outside and pure ugly on the inside.